Gov. Tim Walz caught red-handed coping with Election Day stress by cooking entire potluck dinner at 1 a.m.

There are some behaviors most would consider unbecoming of a potential future vice president, such as a reliance on sex, drugs, or alcohol. Now, Gov. Tim Walz has been caught red-handed coping with Election Day stress with a vice of his own — waking up well before the crack of dawn to prepare an entire potluck dinner.

"Good golly, Tim — it's one in the morning!" pointed out Gwen Walz after walking down the stairs to find her husband toiling away in the kitchen. "Sweetie, we can deal with this when the sun comes up. Let's go back to our room."

The Minnesota governor's wife placed a gentle hand over his in an unsuccessful effort to get him to set down a potato peeler.

"This is what I do, Gwen. Now you can help me shred this block of cheddar or you can go back to bed," said Walz, putting on oven mitts before taking the first of many pans of his signature hotdish out of the oven.

With a sigh only a wife of 20 years could muster, she left her husband to his own devices.

"Ah, shit — the record's skipping," noticed Walz, hurriedly removing the mitts and scurrying over to investigate. "Kamala's going to be so disappointed if she finds out I still haven't listened to this Charles Mingus album. Gosh, oh gosh."

After amending the issue and letting out a small giggle of relief, Harris' running mate got back to his foible.

"Maybe my wonderful wife was right — it's not healthy for me to deal with this stress by baking enough hotdish to feed a high school football team. I need to move on," realized Walz, instead beginning to assemble ingredients to make scotcharoos.

Gwen Walz returned to the kitchen around 7 a.m., just as her spouse settled into brushing his hands on his apron with satisfaction after mixing a giant bowl of puppy chow.

"Is it over? Is it done now?" asked the concerned First Lady of Minnesota.

"The pigs in a blanket are in the oven, sweetie," assured Walz, a look of inner peace spreading across his face akin to someone who has just ripped a bong big time.

The misadventure may concern some voters in an already tight race, but the happening should serve to bond Americans over one thing — the joy of potatoes.

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Photo courtesy of public domain via the Office of Governor Tim Walz & Lt. Governor Flanagan