Report: Vladimir Putin traveling across United States with suitcase full of disguises in effort to vote illegally throughout country

Russian interference in major U.S. elections has become old hat over the last decade, using everything from fake social media content to now creating false bomb threats at polling places in an attempt to discourage would-be voters.

Now dealing with more eyes than ever on Russia's meddling in the American election system, Vladimir Putin appears to have boots on the ground after being spotted lugging a suitcase full of disguises across California's LAX airport in the early hours of Tuesday morning.

"Come on, get it together Vla-Fred," said the Russian president as he attempted to throw his luggage into a taxi, a fake mustache slipping under his sweaty upper lip.

Soon after, an individual matching Putin's description with a blonde, flowing wig and a polo shirt appeared at a polling site in Tempe, Arizona.

"At first, I thought that maybe he was a southern transplant because I couldn't understand his accent very well and he wouldn't shut up about how much he liked iced tea," said one anonymous voter. "Then I realized he was talking about Arizona Iced Tea as if that's all we have here."

It was also noted that the alleged Putin did not complain about the fact that the cans say 99 cents despite almost always costing more, indicating that this was not a true American.

Similar remarks were heard in Georgia, where the former KGB member appeared in line wearing a sweat-stained t-shirt and an orange goatee.

"I love peaches, don't you? I mean, wow. So fuzzy. Can I borrow your name and address?" said Putin to a voter waiting behind him.

While it seems the St. Petersburg product intends to travel to Michigan based on a vintage Barry Sanders Lions jersey haphazardly sticking out of his suitcase, he is currently paused in Wisconsin after Madison locals waiting in a long voting line challenged him to a friendly drinking competition.

Soon after beginning, Putin stumbled to the concrete and opted to nestle up to a nearby dumpster, where he is now resting soundly.

----------------------------------------

Photo courtesy of CC BY 4.0